An Englishman, a Frenchman and an Irishman set up a magazine in London in 2010. This sounds like the beginning of a joke, but when we wrote this just over a week ago, it seemed probable, almost inevitable, that Britain would have voted to leave the EU by the time our next print issue is on press. Post-Brexit, might it be possible for three EU citizens on low incomes to set up an arts and literature magazine in the UK? Rien n’est moins sûr.
The ‘Life in the United Kingdom Test’ is a test for individuals seeking indefinite Leave to Remain in the UK or naturalisation as a British citizen. The test lasts for forty-five minutes, the entrants have to answer twenty-four questions. As of 1 June 2016, it costs £50 to take the test (up from £34). It is a compulsory part of an application for British citizenship or settlement in the UK. Naturalisation costs an additional £1,236. If the polls at the time of writing prove to be correct, two of the founders of The White Review will be taking this test very soon.
These are some of the questions they may be asked:
There is no place in British society for extremism or intolerance.
All dogs in public places must wear:
a) A collar with the name and address of the owner.
b) Wellington boots for big puddles.
c) Sunglasses on a sunny day to avoid eye damage.
d) A raincoat in wet weather.
Who had a great influence on the English language and invented many words that are still common today?
a) Edward Thomas.
b) William Blake.
c) William Shakespeare.
d) Wilfred Owen.
What is the correct order of the national days?
a) St George’s Day, St David’s Day, St Patrick’s Day, St Andrew’s Day.
b) St David’s Day, St Patrick’s Day, St George’s Day, St Andrew’s Day.
c) St Patrick’s Day, St David’s Day, St Andrew’s Day, St George’s Day.
d) St David’s Day, St Patrick’s Day, St Andrew’s Day, St George’s Day.
Pubs are usually open from:
a) 8 a.m.
b) 9 a.m.
c) 10 a.m.
d) 11 a.m.
‘The Enlightenment’ is known as:
a) New ideas about politics, philosophy and science that were developed in the eighteenth century.
b) The abolition of slavery throughout the British empire in the nineteenth century.
c) New laws introduced in the eighteenth century to protect workers.
d) The Industrial Revolution in the eighteenth century.
Many schools organise events to raise money for extra equipment or out-of-school activities.
a) Yes, this is correct.
b) No, schools get money from the government.
When did the first farmers arrive in Britain?
a) 3,000 years ago.
b) 4,000 years ago.
c) 5,000 years ago.
d) 6,000 years ago.
EU citizens who are resident in the UK can vote in national parliamentary elections:
a) Maybe sometimes.
b) Yes, they can.
c) No, they can’t.
Many people volunteer simply because:
a) They don’t want to go to school.
b) They are rich and do not need a paid job.
c) They want to become famous.
d) They want to help other people.
The European Union law is an important source of law in Britain.
At the beginning of the Middle Ages, Ireland was an independent country.
a) Yes, this is true.
b) No, Ireland was part of the United Kingdom.
How many countries are members of the European Union?
Sometimes even radio, television, and newspapers try to fool people with fake stories and jokes.
When did Britain become permanently separate from the continent by the channel?
a) About 5,000 years ago.
b) About 10,000 years ago.
c) About 20,000 years ago.
d) About 30,000 years ago.
We sincerely hope that this editorial turns out to be more comical than anything else. And that you’ll enjoy our next issue, put together at a particularly strange and troubling time.